Crunch
by microw-ve
Summary: “Thanks for having me over for the weekend. My dad insisted I get you something as a thankyou present.” The twins get a box of chocolate from Haruhi as a thankyou for having her over. But something's weird about it. Check my profile to vote for the ending


"Hikaru! Kaoru!" a cheerful voice rang in the hallway.

"Haa-ru-hi!" the twins sang in reply. The petite brunette strode up to them happily, while a well-known blonde sulked in the corner (no, not Nekozawa).

"Thanks for having me over for the weekend. My dad insisted I get you something as a thankyou present." Haruhi held out a white and silver cardboard box, shining and twinkling in the sunlight.

"Aw, Haruhi, you didn't have to…" Kaoru smiled.

"OHMIGOD. C-could it be? Commoner chocolate?" Hikaru gasped audibly.

"Uhh…I guess…we bought it at the supermarket…" Haruhi's brow quirked fractionally.

"Kaoru, can I have some now? Can I, can I?" Hikaru grinned.

"Thanks again, Haruhi," Kaoru smiled sheepishly as Hikaru regarded the shrink-wrapped box with a peculiar expression on his face.

"No problem, Kaoru," Haruhi replied, her lips unturned in the cutest of cute smiles. Tamaki almost fainted.

"Haruhi, what's…this…stretchy clear stuff?" Hikaru pulled at a corner of the shrink-wrap.

"That? That's shrink-wrap plastic. They use it to keep germs out. I think it shrinks when you heat it up."

"Wow…plastic that shrinks when you heat it up! Ingenious!"

"Uhh…I thought it usually did that, Hikaru."

Hikaru released his grip on the plastic, causing it to snap back loudly. "Haruhi, you're too smart." He ruffled said girl's short locks.

"Hey! I am not!" Haruhi groaned.

"Am too!!!" he teased back, tapping his nose. "Anyway, I'm off to eat some of this chocolate." Hikaru started for the club room, tugging at Kaoru's sleeve like a toddler. Kaoru gave Haruhi another quick smile, before sprinting off in the general direction of the 'commoner' chocolate.

***

Crunch.

Crackle.

"Hikaru?" Kaoru ventured, around a mouthful of chocolate.

"Kaoru…it's crunchy." All was silent, but for the slight crunch, crunch of their mouths.

"Yeah. You sure it's chocolate?"

"Sure as. Just look at the box."

"The box says creamy."

"Oh."

Hikaru suddenly lit up. An idea had gotten to him. "Oh, MILORD!!!"

"Damn, Hikaru, you're loud," Kaoru crunched.

"Shhh…I wanna mess with his head a bit."

Tamaki came speeding round the corner, eyes glinting like diamonds on drugs. "Somebody called?"

"Milord, we thought we should share some…chocolate with you. Creamy…chocolate. From Haruhi." Hikaru held the box out, mock-invitingly.

"Chocolate? Haruhi?" His eyes glinted even more. A blur of fingers later, his mouth was chockfull of chocolate, and his eyes had gone from glinting to sparkling with joyful tears.

And then, they were gone. "It's crunchy."

"What? Crunchy? Milord, no way. Chocolate can't be crunchy." Kaoru faked a disbelieving voice, but it failed slightly when a loud crunch sounded from his lips.

"Yeah, Milord, everyone knows chocolate is creamy." Hikaru chimed. He shook his head condescendingly.

"B-but…"

"I mean, have you ever had crunchy chocolate before?" Kaoru asked mysteriously. He leaned in very close, for good effect.

"Aha! This must be a unique type of commoner chocolate! This is astounding! Commoner wisdom is so great as to betray the laws of chocolate!" Tamaki raved.

"Hey, maybe our guests will like to try Haruhi's culture." Hikaru stroked his chin as if he had a beard (he didn't).

"Yeah, we could offer it to them." Kaoru engaged in a similar action to his brother (no, he didn't either).

"Of course! We must ask her to buy more of this crunchy chocolate!"

"Uh, Milord, couldn't we just buy it?"

"Ah, yes! Haruhi must have saved up a great amount of money to buy that chocolate. It is our priority to save her from poverty!"

"Ehh…I don't think she's that poor." Equal-sized sweat drops fell from equal-sized foreheads down equal-sized temples.

He continued without notice. "But where does the chocolate come from?"

"Haruhi said she bought it from the supermarket," Hikaru said.

"Excellent! Tomorrow we are going to the supermarket!"

"Do you even know where it is?"

"Um…"

***

'Crap,' Haruhi thought. 'I'm late for Host Club.' She shoved her books somewhat neatly into her shoulder bag.

Upon arrival, she was met with a shocking situation. Hundreds of girls were raving about the magnificence of the crunchy chocolate. Several cries, both male and female, were heard of, "He's here!" and, "Wow, I never thought crunchy chocolate existed!".

Tamaki sauntered up to her joyfully. "Haruhi! Your amazing crunchy chocolate has done wonders!"

"What crunchy chocolate?" she replied, dumbfounded.

"The box you gave to Hikaru and Kaoru! It's incredible, the vast, mysterious knowledge of commoners! You must tell us more!"

Haruhi's eyes dilated. She hadn't even given it a thought. Chocolate was chocolate, right?

"Senpai, what does it taste like?"

"Er…chocolate."

She glanced around the room. Hikaru and Kaoru were shamelessly advertising both their homo-twins charm and their extraordinary crunchy confectionery. Honey was trying to outstare the chocolate box. Mori was…doing what he usually did, except his mouth had something sharp and angular inside it (any guesses?). Kyouya was trying not to look interested, but the quiet crackling coming from his mouth gave it all away. In the corner, she saw multitudes of shiny cardboard boxes, stacked on top of one another.

A light bulb suddenly lit up in her head, overheated and exploded. Bits of glass littered her brain, but that's not the point.

"You know, you're going to get fat, what with all that chocolate."

Tamaki's eyes expanded instantaneously. "F-fat?" he whispered, horrified.

"Yep." Haruhi nodded solemnly, trying to hide the laugh tickling her throat.

And right there and then, Tamaki fainted.

***

P.S. Nobody ever figured out the mystery of the crunchy chocolate. Can you solve it? Solutions in the reviews please!

By the way, this is my first story :D I think I've made Hikaru too childish. O_o Please, please, please tell me if the characters appear OOC!

Cheers!

Microwave


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